Sinead O’Connor and Dr Phil with transcript

Following Sinead’s suicide this is her talk to Dr Phil in Sept 2017

[1c] 2017 Sept Odysee Dr Phil talks to Sinead O’Connor

Links

[1] dr phil https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=acbNkAs1z_Y

[1c] 2017 Sept Odysee Dr Phil talks to Sinead O’Connor https://odysee.com/@FoxesAmazingChannel:8/Dr.-Phil-S16E01—Singer-Sinead-O%E2%80%99Connor-Speaks-Out-after-Hotel-Breakdown_-The-Exclusive-Interview-acbNkAs1z_Y:8

Transcript

oday on the season premiere of dr phil i’m not staying alone for me for me if

0:06 it was me i’d be gone straight away back to my mom are you mentally ill

0:13 sinead o’connor i became very suicidal it was a basket case [Music]

0:20 when you were 21 you had the number one song in the world but i also felt like an imposter why

0:27 when you tore the pope’s picture up on saturday night live whose picture were you tearing up

0:33 i’m changing my name schneider connor had calm that person’s calm will you don’t experiment with me is it gonna

0:38 make me cry all the flowers that you planted mama

0:45 in the backyard what do you love about your mother but i love her like my mother thought she’s dead

0:52 when you went away you say she abused you physically and sexually tell me what

0:57 happened where do i start at the beginning i know that living with your baby was

1:04 sometimes hard she ran a torture chamber she was a person who took delight in

1:09 hurting you three weeks ago i wrote my suicide match

1:16 you tried to kill yourself eight times in one year do you want to be dead

1:24 [Music] now from nashville tennessee here’s dr phil

1:33 today marks the first day of the 16th season of dr phil back in the very beginning almost 3 000

1:41 episodes ago i pledged to use this platform to focus on the hidden epidemics in america

1:47 and strive to give a voice to those who struggle to be heard we begin this year with an interview that i think addresses

1:54 both janae o’connor shot to fame with her haunting rendition

1:59 of prince’s song nothing compares to you

2:07 sinead o’connor is the rock star who is of course as famous for her look as her songs she has served notice that this is

2:12 no ordinary talent ladies and gentlemen please meet sinead o’connor

2:18 when singer-songwriter sinead o’connor burst onto the music scene in the late 80s we had never heard or seen anybody

2:25 like her while she sings sweetly and speaks softly her actions have made headlines she became notorious around

2:30 the world when she tore up a photo of beloved pope john paul ii on saturday night live

2:36 fight the real enemy please join me now in welcoming sinead o’connor

2:43 sinead was a superstar with a grammy-winning multi-platinum album critics said that the then 23 year old

2:51 singer was poised to become one of the most influential figures of her generation

2:57 recently fans were stunned to see the songstress had fallen on desperate times

3:04 when she posted a troubling cry for help video an alarming facebook video singer sinead

3:10 o’connor is gaining views and some growing concerns i’m now living in a travel launch motel

3:16 i’m gonna find kidney stones i’m all by myself and there’s absolutely nobody in my life except my doctor

3:23 then mental illness you know it’s a bit like drugs it doesn’t give it who you are sinead o’connor alone distraught and

3:30 having what appears to be a complete mental breakdown like so many compassionate and caring

3:37 fans we expressed our concern and willingness to help sinead learned she was on our

3:43 radar and took the initiative to call me at my office at paramount studios

3:48 along with her manager and a representative from the jazz foundation a musician support organization what

3:56 we’re going to try and do is get a transporter we will get you to

4:03 nashville tennessee to the milestones program you got all these people in your life

4:09 you’re not alone anymore now sinead a longtime fan of our work

4:14 asked for my help despite questioning whether she felt like she really deserved the focus and

4:20 energy we offered to work with sinead privately but she was insistent that her goal was

4:26 to destigmatize mental illness she said she did not want to live in the

4:31 shadows anymore and wanted to use her struggle with mental illness to inspire

4:36 others to reach out for help she wanted to be an example and a voice of hope

4:45 very exciting to be going to get some proper help thank god i’m so grateful to dr phil for helping out i’m the luckiest

4:51 girl in the world i feel like a cinderella we were able to arrange for sinead to leave new jersey and be

4:56 transported by a team of professionals to the beautiful and tranquil milestones

5:02 at on-site treatment center located on a hundred acres of rolling hills in tennessee

5:08 this is her story i really

5:14 sincerely want to help you okay you are a very

5:20 important teaching tool because you are absolutely

5:26 inspirational to millions of others that

5:32 are struggling with what you’re struggling with and for you to have the courage to candidly and

5:37 openly talk about this gives others the courage to come forward and seek the help they need and so well

5:45 i’m hoping we can save some lives well you’re using your life to do exactly that there’s a certain group of people who

5:51 are absolutely afraid to open their mouth about mental illness and that is rockers

5:57 people in the music business famous people i think it’s important that we those of a story in the entertainment industry

6:03 actually do begin to open up you posted a video on facebook a few weeks ago

6:09 that had a lot of people concerned about your well-being i can’t tell you how

6:14 many messages we got from people i always love hearing dr phil say i’m not

6:19 going to give up on you can he do anything for sinead o’connor as everyone has seemed to have given up on her

6:26 i know he will not please help this woman then here’s another one dr phil i saw

6:32 this most heart-wrenching video cry from singer sinead o’connor on the daily mail

6:37 feed then here’s another one dear dr phil i just saw sinead o’connor’s heartbreaking but powerful video

6:45 it moved me i so hope you could help her out mm-hmm i mean i’ve got pages in particular i’m

6:52 actually just really moved by that i mean look at these just that it’s just so lovely i’m so moved i

6:58 have to say thank you to all of those people thank you so much you know i have millions of viewers and they watch for a

7:04 reason and they know that i take this seriously and they took you seriously i

7:09 can’t tell you how moved i am i can’t find the words for once in my life dr phil and these people are the first

7:15 people to ever manage to shut your native connor up well i have to tell you

7:20 in all seriousness i’m really sorry it took me this long to find you

7:26 i’m not because i’m so happy that you did this is the time that god decided you

7:31 were supposed to find me yeah i mean that’s why all these people are writing and saying you know please

7:37 please help this woman it isn’t funny how god works in very mysterious ways because this all kicked off this

7:42 few years of nightmare started with a kidney stone but now i’m glad because if not for the kidney stone i wouldn’t have

7:48 had the pity party that made me make the video and we wouldn’t be sitting here now you know i want to play

7:55 a little bit of that video and ask you to comment on it

8:01 i just can’t understand how a person could be left so long and i want everyone to see what it’s like

8:07 that’s why i’m making this video all the people who are supposed to be loving you and taking care of you

8:13 are treating you like who are the people that won’t take care of you are you talking about your family

8:19 yeah now obviously i want to be really covered because like i love my family and i don’t blame them it’s not easy for families of mentally

8:26 ill people we can be difficult what happened was i had been writing to my family begging letters you know and

8:32 angry letters and waiting and i don’t want to make out like i’m a victim here i give it as good as i can i would pregnant i was in my family i thought

8:39 it’d be better maybe my family might if they saw how i’m feeling they would relate to it

8:44 you don’t even care i hoped in my kidney stone madness that my family would see

8:50 it and go oh my god we didn’t realize it’s that bad we’ll go get her watch no how do you know they talk one

8:57 of them told me yeah i rang one of the fathers of my children

9:03 uh who happened to be five miles away from me in new york at the time and had my 10 ten-year-old child and didn’t bring him to see me

9:09 are you mentally ill i don’t believe i am now unless you say the complex post-traumatic stress

9:15 disorder is a mental illness i’ve had a psychiatrist one psychiatrist told me i’m the sanest person he’s ever met which of course everyone laughs at when

9:21 i say that musicians are always a little on the edge we’re somewhere out there also i’m a

9:26 child abuse survivor very severe child abuse survivor so you know i’m a little out there i’m unusual irregular

9:32 eccentric what kicked all of this off really was that i had a hysterectomy a radical hysterectomy in ireland uh two

9:39 years ago and i lost my mind after that and that’s i think what happened with my family and we have to give my family

9:44 credit and and you know they’re not here to speak for themselves so i don’t want to disrespect them but the fact is they

9:49 didn’t know who the hell i was i was told to leave the hospital two days after the surgery with tylenol and no

9:55 hormone replacement and no guidance as to what might happen to me i was flung into surgical menopause so hormones were

10:02 everywhere i became very suicidal i was a basket case so yeah i would say that after the hysterectomy i was i was

10:08 mental when we talked on the phone you told me that you tried to kill yourself eight

10:15 times no i counted up the times in my life that i’ve tried one year why

10:21 because they left me they left me and they wouldn’t let me see my child his father who never

10:26 bothered with the child snuck him into foster care behind my back while i was in hospital trying to recover from being bonkers so often my

10:33 family my family they all left the joy there for six months of course i lost the plot raging angry

10:40 angry and anger was part of the suicidal feeling and also was grief and unfairness and i can’t get hurt unless

10:46 i’m dead in front of them blah blah you know but that’s what it was really about that’s what made me lose my absolute

10:51 mind was that they kept me from my most vulnerable child also in some of my abuse as a child my mother quite

10:58 regularly was attempting to destroy my reproductive system so the surgery was very triggering

11:05 you say your mother abused you physically and sexually

11:10 and this is really important to me tell me what happened

11:16 what did she do [Music] coming up

11:21 where do i start at the beginning she ran a torture chamber she was a

11:26 person who took delight in hurting you she used to make me say over and over i am nothing i’m nothing or it’s repeating

11:32 me i think it’s very important i tell you my mother is not the only person i’ve been raped by

11:39 tomorrow on an all-new dr phil a daughter’s suicide you believe her boyfriend knew she was

11:46 going to kill herself and two parents i love samantha more than anyone i have ever met you didn’t

11:52 go to the funeral no i had a licensure exam that day struggling with grief

11:58 her clothes why can we not have our daughter’s clothes i told you they were outside you

12:04 could come get them that’s tomorrow

12:13 [Music] we now return to dr phil’s exclusive

12:19 interview with sinead o’connor you say your mother abused you physically and sexually

12:27 and this is really important to me tell me what happened

12:32 she was not well she was really very very very not well i would say she was possessed although i’m not sure i

12:38 believe in such things so i either she was just a sadist and a pedophile or

12:46 she was possessed by the devil well let me work backwards here when you

12:51 were eight your parents divorced after a really troubled relationship

12:57 and well there was no divorce in ireland they separated and then what happened was when the day my father left we were

13:03 very upset my father had built us a shed in the garden a hut to play in my mother was so angry at us for being

13:09 upset that he left that she said right if you love him that much he can live in the shed so from the day he left we were

13:14 living in the garden for months when you mean garden you mean the yard backyard the backyard yeah

13:20 it would not be fair for me to discuss anything that she did to my siblings so i have to only discuss what she did to

13:26 me she ran a torture chamber it was a torture chamber she was a person who took delight with smile and in hurting

13:32 you what did she do where do i start at the beginning my earliest memory

13:37 she’s telling me that i shouldn’t have been born she didn’t want me she didn’t want girls she wants me to be a boy she dresses me

13:44 like a boy she chops my hair off whenever she beats me which is daily i’m naked she makes me take my clothes off i

13:51 have to lie on the floor i have to open my arms and legs i have to let her attack my abdomen

13:57 um she wants to burst my womb she wants to destroy my reproductive she’ll stop me being a female

14:03 she did this to you for how long a period of time

14:09 so she basically it would be sweeping brushes she’d be stamping on with her feet the phone would drain the middle of it and she’d be like oh hi how are you

14:15 her foot would be on my neck on the floor on three four or five years late kindergarten i win the prize

14:21 for curling up in the smallest bowl i remember being about five or so we were meant to go somewhere for the weekend she made me put on a dress that

14:28 used to belong to my sister and the button was missing she beats me because the button is missing off the dress

14:33 takes the dress takes the light bulb out of my room locks me in my room and then everybody leaves for the weekend

14:40 she the type of person should make you get every bible in the house and every hockey stick we used to be terrified the

14:45 last day of school and summer was the most unhappy day of our lives all the other kids be delighted we’d be hiding the hockey sticks in the tennis racks

14:51 and crying because we’re stuck with her for the summer she would invent reasons to beat you up like she’d say the lampshade is crooked

14:57 my job was to clean the house so if i left the lampshade a bit crooked after i dusted it she beat i mean daily this

15:03 went on the only thing you’d be sure of every day is you’re going to get kicked out when you hear the steps of her waking up literally me and my brother

15:10 used to pee our pants how long did this go on until i was 13 i ran away she used to make me say over and over i am not

15:16 thinking i’m nothing while she was beating me i am nothing i am nothing i am nothing that’s a very small toy after

15:21 a while you begin to believe it in fact you are nothing for 38 years

15:27 these wounds have been festering within you and you’ve never had trauma treatment

15:34 for this until right now this was my treatment i understand music i think it’s very important i tell you

15:41 that my mother is not the only person i’ve been raped by i’ve been raped several times by other people

15:46 uh as a child and how old are we talking about oh three four five six seven eight nine 10

15:53 11 12. this was an ongoing part of your life strangers in ireland yet who was

15:59 protecting you social services didn’t exist i mean i had my mother put in hospital at 13 for three entire months

16:04 which is why i had the courage to leave because i had three months freedom my first single is a song called

16:09 troy it talks all about i remember at dublin the rainstorm sitting in the long grass

16:14 and some are keeping warm and keeps talking about the garden the garden it’s like there’s constant references even in

16:20 my songs if you listen to my albums from time you know memorial like with their

16:25 diaries of the person in recovery from child abuse from from song one single one is telling you what happened and the

16:32 reason i’ve done that is because i knew if i didn’t tell and i didn’t become well known no

16:37 one would ever have known we existed what happened to us in that house should there should be a monument to it

16:44 there was a point at which she stopped abusing you right yeah did you ever talk to her about it

16:51 coming up there’s a reason for everything i do and this has to do with your mother will you

16:56 do an experiment with me is it going to make me cry

17:02 dr phil’s exclusive interview with sinead o’connor continues

17:08 did you grow up in a house of horrors bear in mind this is what happened in in ireland to ireland’s children should

17:15 they this is not normal the priests were teaching it to the

17:21 people priests were not teaching mothers to go home and stomp the ovaries out of their children when you’re a child a child

17:28 doesn’t deserve that you say your mother abused you physically and sexually

17:34 there was a point at which she stopped abusing you right yeah so what happened was she says there’s some spoons missing

17:40 from the drawer she’s going to beat me up if i don’t find them i run out to the garage and i just run i

17:45 just keep running so i go to my father then you know i didn’t get on with my father at all he sent me away to one of these mags on the laundry she paid them

17:52 to take me this was like a group home in magdalen laundry and they were notorious yeah and i used to run away

17:58 from the place interestingly the nun there bought me my first guitar they’re the ones that spotted okay the only way

18:03 we’re gonna save this music you know anyway i go there and i’m running away from there all the time to my mother to

18:08 go stay with my mother i guess i got to be the same size as her she stopped hitting me you know so we developed a

18:13 very good relationship between the age of 14 and 16 and a half with a great

18:19 relationship because she was blown away that i forgave her did you ever talk to her about it one day i did ask her why

18:25 did you do what you did to us and she said i never did anything what are you talking about and i was furious

18:31 raging with her that i didn’t talk to her for about nine months next thing i hear she’s dead in a car

18:36 crash did you have unfinished emotional business with her when she died the whole family did nothing could ever be

18:42 fixed again and will never be fixed again it’s very kind of god to take her her life was hell

18:47 you wouldn’t want to be her you know so i was relieved for her relief for me

18:52 but devastated the loss of her she was my best friend there’s a reason for everything i do and

18:59 this has to do with your mother will you do an experiment with me is it going to make me cry i don’t know okay okay i’m

19:05 looking for the exit you don’t need to run the first thing i want you to do with

19:10 your eyes closed is i want you to picture your mother’s face

19:17 and when i say picture your mother i mean i want you to see her face

19:23 negative or posse doesn’t matter see your eyes see her skin

19:28 the way her hair fell over her forehead i want you to experience

19:34 the scent that identified your mother the sound of her footfall when you hear

19:41 her walking the tilt of her head everything that defined your mother

19:48 now i want you to answer this question what i resent about my mother

19:56 go on she won’t change her clothes she won’t wash same for us five years living

20:02 in the same clothes no washing she won’t heat the house she won’t get lights she won’t get out of bed she

20:08 won’t stop taking drugs she never tells me i’m pretty she never tells me i i’m

20:14 sweet she makes my little brother scream she smells sick there was a smell about her that was sickness

20:21 smelly evil you know how did she hurt you how did she hurt you inside

20:27 kicking me kicking me and kicking me and kicking me and kicking me and telling me i’m evil and telling i

20:33 shouldn’t have been born and i’m the reason my father left is my fault all right change of question what i

20:39 wanted from my mother i did not get cuddles love kisses sweet names

20:45 snuggles sleep in the bed with her sweet presents tell me what i miss about my mother

20:52 i hate not being able to love her i hate not being able to have taken care of her maybe giving her some love back

20:58 help her help her nobody helped her i miss that i cannot put my arms around her and tell her i love her and that

21:04 she’s all right and actually you know mother her i wanted to mother her i

21:09 would have taken care of her even if she was an absolute monster without even thinking

21:14 what do you love about your mother the first thing that came to my mind actually is that she’s dead which is a

21:19 very strange thing to come to mind but i love about my mother that she did i think it was very kind of her although i met her

21:26 horribly i really ate for and i think that’s part of where my suicidal instinct comes from is that i want my

21:32 mother but i cannot wait until the day that i naturally get to heaven so that i can see my mother again okay do this for

21:39 me close your eyes one more time if you sat before your mother right now

21:45 and you had one minute left in this world what would you say to your mother

21:51 i throw myself on her like a monkey and i’d never let go i love you i love you i missed you so bad i miss you so bad my life has been

21:59 terrible terrible terrible terrible bad yeah

22:06 i can’t wait to see her again i tell her i love her

22:13 would she hurt for you would she feel your pain did i miss her

22:19 yeah i like to believe and i do believe that me forgiving her and loving her has helped

22:24 her in terms of her karmic payback after death to be in each other’s arms

22:29 maybe that’s what me and her want really do know what i mean to be in each other’s arms

22:35 would make both of us so happy you know do you think

22:40 with the clarity of where she is she knows what she did to you

22:46 coming up when you were 21 you had the number one

22:53 song in the world but i also felt like an imposter how so

23:01 all the flowers that you planted mama in the backyard

23:08 do you think your mother with the clarity of where she is she knows what she did to you yeah but she knows that

23:15 it’s okay because i forgive her i’d try to get my sister to forgive her

23:21 she said no i can’t and i had a nightmare about it that night and i said to my mother

23:26 are you not upset that my sister can’t forgive you my mother said i do not want what i haven’t got

23:32 and that’s why i call the album that and when i cried in that video it was my mother i was thinking about it

23:38 [Music]

23:45 one tear falls down my face in the video but she’s really to have my love and my forgiveness you know

23:52 you said she cut your hair off yeah why do you keep your hair shaved when we were children my sister had the most

23:58 beautiful red hair glorious red hair the type you’d be jealous of like just just beautiful you

24:04 know like that gorgeous woman on that show mad men you know that woman that just like is like jessica rabbit looking

24:11 you know but my mother took it into her head that my sister’s hair was ugly and horrible and disgusting and she started

24:17 when i had long hair she would introduce us as her pretty daughter and her ugly daughter

24:22 and that’s why i chopped my hair off i didn’t want to be pretty

24:28 it was dangerous to be pretty too because i kept getting raped and molested everywhere i went have you ever told anybody that’s why you keep your

24:34 hair cut sure come with a couple of my friends you know you know but that was a huge part of it but i

24:39 didn’t want to be raped i demanded an elastic i did not want to dress like a girl i did not want to be pretty you know other girls beat you up if you’re

24:46 pretty too the other reason was in the music business i was asked one day by my record company would i grow my hair long

24:52 and wear short skirts because they wanted to sell me on my sexuality and i was like i didn’t want to be sold on

24:57 that i wanted if i it was going to be successful i wanted to because i was

25:02 a good musician so i said no it’s got to be about how i sound and now plus i was a protest

25:09 singer i came from an age of protest singers the artists i was influenced by it such a they weren’t the type that

25:14 were selling themselves on how they looked when you were 21 you had the number one song in the world

25:22 did you feel like you had the number one song in the world yeah

25:29 but i also felt like an imposter how so well i knew because of my own song i couldn’t

25:35 understand why people like my songs the songs i wrote that was the prince songs of course i

25:40 thought well that’s great it’s a prince song of course everybody loves it but i felt like the imposter that that people loved the album

25:47 that’s what was shocking to me so i’d be doing the gigs and i’d be singing my songs and the people going mental and i’d be thinking why are they all going

25:53 mental and i’m just complete and then i’m on like david letterman or i’m on jay leno or i’m on i’m like i’m an

25:59 imposter what am i doing here why are these people i felt like an imposter which i a lot of musicians feel a lot of

26:05 musicians tell you the same thing as soon as you get off stage you’re just the way you normally are yeah i mean i’m

26:10 just the country boyfriend yeah and i’m just a crazy [ __ ] from dublin you know when you tore the pope’s picture up on

26:17 saturday night live whose picture were you tearing up uh the popes i mean what did the pope

26:24 represent to you coming up i actually became a singer because i

26:30 thought it was so evil that i was going to go to hell and i wanted to sing so that i might have a chance of getting

26:35 into heaven dr phil’s exclusive interview with

26:41 sinead o’connor continues when you tore the pope’s picture up on

26:46 saturday night live whose picture were you tearing up uh the popes i mean what did the pope

26:53 represent to you interestingly what people don’t know is that first of all we in ireland knew 10 years before you

27:00 all did that child boosted in the catholic church weird evidence the photo itself had been on my mother’s

27:06 bedroom wall all my life i was genuinely very angry with what the church were doing by ripping that

27:12 picture you know i risked my career everything i could be a billionaire now if i wanted if i believed in that you know what i mean but i don’t but i know

27:19 what you’re getting at and yes i didn’t this didn’t occur to me until about six months ago it’s my father

27:26 did you know you were going to do it when you went on mm-hmm so i had planned it for a couple of weeks at the very end i pulled out the picture

27:32 of the pipe and tear it up threw it at the camera silence

27:38 everywhere it is fantastic so what happened afterwards my manager vanished for about three days

27:44 he went to his hotel just unplugged the phone about 10 years after that that i don’t remember because that’s when it

27:49 became acceptable and it became the norm that i was treated by everyone i knew from

27:54 family to everyone like i was an absolutely insane crazy person here’s the thing i look at things

28:01 from the standpoint of why people do what they do and don’t do what they don’t do we’ve got a situation where

28:07 you’ve gone through horrific sexual abuse physical abuse you’ve gone through

28:13 serious abandonment this leaves really scars on people and to me when i

28:19 talk about psychological scars it’s the same as if you had a scar on your arm i

28:24 have a few of my body from me mummy nice memories you then have a hysterectomy for some women

28:31 your hormones can change dramatically and you can become

28:36 very depressed then we we have to understand that part of your sexual abuse is your

28:43 mother stomping on your reproductive system now here they come at age 49

28:50 and somebody says okay we are taking your reproductive system it’s not a real stretch to think that that triggers of

28:58 course okay here we go my mother she’s getting her way then

29:04 your child is now my most vulnerable and you don’t know where so i started asking myself not why

29:11 you’re reacting the way you are but why not exactly can i high-five you yes you can thank

29:17 you okay so now that’s what i’ve been screaming at but no one can hear me and

29:22 you know why it’s because i’m sinead o’connor the artist who ripped up the picture of the pope i told you on the phone

29:31 i said you’re not alone anymore and i meant that

29:36 a million people said that to me and you’re the only person that had ever said it that i believed it

29:41 and you know why i believed it because you kind of kicked my ass as well yeah it made me trust you

29:47 did you feel that you were left to die alone coming up

29:53 tell me about this guitar when i took an overdose about three weeks ago i wrote my suicide note

30:00 honest schneider connor’s gone that person’s gone why

30:07 dr phil’s exclusive interview with sinead o’connor continues

30:12 did you feel that you were left to die alone yeah i was left to dialogue

30:17 i mean my family principally really the the final reason that they buggered off on me was because i was suicidal because

30:23 i made a suicide attempt you’re not a horrible evil person okay

30:29 i actually became a singer because i thought it was so evil that i was going to go to hell and i

30:34 wanted to sing so that i might have a chance of getting into heaven you didn’t respond to what i said that

30:40 i’m not a horrible evil person yeah well it’s very nice of you to tell me that thank you very much

30:47 i am beginning to believe that i am beginning to understand that i am it helps that you’re confirming what i thought which is that you know why

30:53 wouldn’t i have lost my flipping monitor listen i made you present i’ve got to show you what it is we had to draw a

30:59 picture of what our life would look like if it was exactly what we wanted and i’ll explain it

31:05 all right okay for some reason i’ve been an enormous attachment to the american military and i

31:11 want to work with the dying veterans specifically as a slitter that’s terrific and it’s very

31:17 forward-looking you have to sign it for me

31:24 my new name

31:29 okay and what is it mike the david schneider counter to calm

31:36 that person is gone why because i don’t want to be that person anymore are you going to record as magna devitt

31:43 the artist formerly known as chad yeah the first album i’ll have to say that i will have to do like princeton

31:49 do you think it will be hard to resurrect your singing career after

31:54 being away for a period of time no no my my my career is in live performance that’s that’s what i’m born for i am a

32:02 very very very brilliant live performer and i love it i told david foster that

32:08 i was going to talk with you and that you said one of the things you wanted to

32:14 do was get back to your music and i said if um if she wants to will you

32:20 [Music] work with her and do songs you’re kidding me you’re joking

32:25 right you’re kidding me right this is just like unbelievable like i’m cinderella here this is great because

32:31 the whole thing since you got in touch i’m like cinderella i asked him if uh he would work with you produce a song

32:39 right with you and this was his response oh my god of course 100 whatever you need from me

32:46 i am there for an hour a day or a week she’s a major talent i was just talking about her the other day oh my god

32:53 because you know i think we’re doing so much good to start making some bloody music i haven’t been working for two years well that’s why i was saying i’ve

32:59 been working on this from every angle tell me about this guitar i i wrote my

33:05 first two albums on uh 12 string guitar so i bought this beautiful gretch guitar

33:11 on amazon and i when i took an overdose about three weeks ago i wrote my

33:18 suicide note on it which i don’t know if you want to see

33:24 says forgive me i just could go no further hashtag one of millions

33:30 after that i put the video on facebook a beautiful irishman calls me who i happen to have bumped into 20 years ago in

33:36 ireland one day he lives in jersey says i know these people the jazz foundation they work at englewood hospital i’m

33:41 going to bring you there they’re going to help you out next thing i meet wendy and they saved my life they literally bring me bra clothes shoes everything i

33:48 have nothing the jazz foundation are incredible people and we do have a crisis in rock and roll at the moment of

33:54 suicides the whole purpose was to bring this to the attention of other

33:59 people to help them avoid committing suicide well that’s the thing she’s using her life and

34:05 but that’s the time to use it she’s a great teaching tool and she has all of this stretched out ahead of her and the

34:11 musicians are the healers so i would like to be able if you would allow me to read the list of the names

34:17 of all of the rock and roll suicides that have happened since rock and roll began okay here we go graham bond

34:24 pete hamm phil oakes tom evans del shannon richard manuel danny gatton

34:33 brad delp vince welnick ronnie montrose bob welsh keith emerson

34:40 chris cornell chester bennington kurt cobain obviously i include amy winehouse

34:46 i include any artist who died from drugs in the music business that is suicidal behavior

34:54 whitney houston for a daughter as well god help her well that’s i know they’re i know there

35:00 are hundreds more there are hundreds more but i want to include it in there everybody that died of drugs or drink

35:07 will you play it yeah i will sing you a song but i’d love to yeah when we come back you’ll get a chance to

35:12 hear sinead sing her voice is just as pure as when she released

35:18 nothing compares to you but first take a look at some of the other great shows we’re working on this

35:24 season we’re starting season 16. can you believe it

35:29 you bring heroin into my home you gave up on me you’ve told me i wish you were dead

35:35 where did these come from never in my life have i been physical with anybody your son was a part of my family my son

35:42 has never been a part of your family i’m a really good drunk driver she was

35:49 arrested in her bar with no pants on do you seriously believe you’re not an alcoholic what about our wedding day you

35:55 need to learn how to close your mouth you need to get yourself under control

36:01 why are you dating a 14 year old child that’s a fourth degree felony you’re just a loser paul you’re a verbally

36:08 abusive dictator you’re the failure of a parent you’re the failure of a parent you have no job you are living in the

36:14 car i have two vehicles does the other one have a windshield

36:21 who do you think you’re talking to i am your father your daughter we know is violent and

36:26 physical if you want to get up in her face and say what are you doing

36:34 i hate myself so much there are times where i just want to die

36:39 but if i’ve killed myself i know my family would be so hurt so that’s when i just hurt myself

36:47 so they wouldn’t have to pay for a funeral

36:53 my stepdad is guilty of molesting me and my sisters these women have lied to put me in jail

36:59 you know what you did i didn’t do what you said i did oh yes you did

37:05 i am not a liar i am a strong powerful woman despite all the crap that you did

37:10 to me [Music]

37:18 you say nobody listens to you nobody gets it nobody understands

37:24 look me in the eye i do [Applause]

37:33 i have often said when guests are on dr phil that it’s the beginning rare the end of

37:39 their relationship with us as of today sinead is beginning her fifth week of intensive work

37:46 and she has made unbelievable strides now it has not and will not be a success

37:53 only journey she has had some rough patches bucked and been critical of programs and

37:59 protocols at the treatment center one night only to apologize say she had made more

38:05 progress there than anywhere else in her life and begged to be readmitted the following day

38:13 i think what we’ve done today with everything that we’ve talked about yeah is really kind of a to-do list for all

38:20 the team here to say here’s some stuff where they can take that yeah and use that as a guide you

38:26 know the best predictor of future behavior is relevant past behavior you know as soon as you create a week then

38:32 two weeks three weeks then those three weeks predict the next three weeks and then pretty soon you can have momentum

38:38 in a healthy direction and you’re finding meaning and creating value yeah and creating relationships

38:48 cool thank you so much everybody all right that was just great to say ever really brilliant thank you so much

38:54 really i’ll never forget it sinead recently progressed to the point where she was no longer resistant to

39:01 or threatened by certain psychiatric modalities that her milestones at on-site team felt she needed

39:08 as a result we were able to make arrangements for her to be temporarily moved to a psychiatric inpatient

39:15 facility where intensive diagnostics including blood chemistries brain scans hormonal

39:20 profiling and advanced psychometrics will inform a customized psychiatric

39:26 treatment protocol creative care is an inpatient treatment facility that’s been in business since 1989. it

39:34 is one of the most serene beautiful places that you can go it is staffed with some of the top

39:40 mental health professionals in the world for really getting people to work

39:45 through and get down to the core of what’s going on with them now once they’re there we step back and

39:51 let them do their thing that’s for them not for us but suffice it to say sinead feels like

39:57 she is no longer alone and that she is now getting more support care and love than she has had

40:04 in the last 20 living years you baby was sometimes

40:13 hard but i’m willing to give it another try

40:21 oh [Music]

40:36 goal is clearly to continue to get healthy so she can rebuild key relationships in her life

40:42 and help others in need specifically other struggling musicians as well as our underserved veterans

40:49 sinead seems committed to reclaiming her life and using her considerable heart and

40:55 talent to touch the lives of others at this point she has the resources the rest

41:03 is up to her for more information go to drphil.com thanks for watching